A Christmas, Darkened (Rabbits in the Tree)

a Christmas, darkened now
streetlight and moonlight and starlight
shining from the crusts of ice
making even the dirty snow seem clean

above me you slumber
as i thaw meat for our bellies
so that we may eat together soon

and of all the gifts i received
on this day and all the past others
You are the Gift i am most thankful for
You are the Gift i cling to most desperately
and You are the Gift i shall most strive to deserve

they say He died for our sins
but i say back that loving you is so pure
so free of sin
that He should be reborn again
and Easter occur months early
a birthday and a re-birthday for Him
and, as every other day,
for my love of You

Anew for You

you're wearing nature as your gown
with pinecone buttons
and a vineyard sash

you're decked out in mountains
with outcrop earrings
and feet snug in foothills

you're looking good in your ocean
with coral reef gloves
and a scarf of seagulls

every climate is yours
every environment suits itself to your needs
every time i look at you
the world ends and begins
anew
for you

To Be a Pillow

as you lay sleeping with your head on my lap
i am wishing i could watch your dreams unfold for you
but of course i cannot
they are safely ensconced within your lovely head
are they good ones?
where you get all that you deserve
and i am the man you need me to be?
do you watch us grow old together
and smile together sadly
as the little one becomes not so little?
do we walk through this long path of life
and on to the next?
soon, sleep will come for me as well
do you dream of me, angel?
for i surely will of you

To Gladly Drown

i drive a Saturn
but it's Venus who drives me
when every action is for my woman
and her smell crowds aside all thoughts in my head
her hands the scales on which i weigh decisions
and her ribs the vault that guards my treasure
her skin my appetizer, main course, and dessert
and her eyes
O!
gods
her
E
Y
E
S
like twin ponds beckoning, begging, pleading
to lose me in their depths
and i answer:
gladly

Crow and Raven

what's the difference between crow and raven
when you're too busy misbehavin'
savin' cents in jugs and baskets
layin' down in rose red caskets
ask its purpose, find its truth
mourn the loss of strength and youth
forsooth! you've found a secret door!
enter, enter, sweep the floor
decor of cedar, spruce and birch
each color causes hearts to lurch
besmirch that which you once held dear
wish that it would disappear
draw near, my child, and listen up
you must sow and reap before you sup

Bigger Boat

the thin line blurs
'twixt his and hers
and throaty purrs
in the conifers
give one last breath, last push, last shove
last starlit night, last chance for love
last time to kiss, last time to bite
last chance to crush with all your might
but first let's go from shadow to light
from wrong to right
then back to wrong because that's where the fun is
that's where the bun is
baking
rising
overcooking
overlooking the flaws
the sharpened points of your claws
the click and the clack of your ever-working jaws
and i can't help but think
as we bob and float
'we're gonna need a bigger boat'

Hands

does a hand come, disembodied
from the depths of hammerspace
to shelter your spark as you build a fire?
one does for me

and though i try now to live
to love
to bask in the light
i cannot find it in me to scoff at the dark
for that is where the magic trickles
from fingertips
from smooching lips
from lovers' hands on lovers' hips

and given a chance to pay it back
a hand reaching out to soothe
or protect or caress
or merely let someone know it's there
it exists
and it knows you exist too

you exist too
and i am thankful

autumn (remembrance, the sacred act of)

..........(breathe in. take it in. keep it in.)
think of the things you'll never have
and the things you have but don't need
the rule of things, and things ruled by
or fooled by
and you try not to let go of
..........(breathe out. let it out. force it out.)
cry your fool eyes dry and sandy
and cry out for something better or worse
when crying means an idea passed due
or last due
and you hope that you can just make
..........(clench those tight fists tighter)
wonder why death tastes like chocolate and ashes
and will wonders never cease
with wonderful woe and wailing hearts
or failing hearts
and you never got that last chance to
..........(open your mouth. wider. widest.)
fall in love and from grace
and fall comes back with its colors and smells
and falling down feels like growing up
or throwing up
and your scraped knees and clear mind show that you made it

this time

life pie

dogs in bowls, fish in cages
birds in spinning wheels
when you're plumb out of joie de vivre
you care not how it feels

listen, smell, and run hands over
seeking hidden cracks
the only time you smile is when
security is lax

the sun is on the parapets
the moon is in the john
the daughters are a-laughing
at the current goings-on

one can scream, protest and balk
it matters not a bit
sometimes the pie life gives you
will still taste just like shit

Poe, Poe Me

As I sit in sunlight stippling
My hair in the warm breeze a-rippling
The warmth working its way into my cracked and aging bones

I whisper into my own ears
And bring to focus doubts and fears
Using that which some may call sweet, cajoling tones

When O when, I ask myself,
Did feelings forgotten on top shelf
Begin to fester, rot and thicken, turning rancid black?

The answer becomes clear to me
Frightening in its simplicity
'Twas the night on which my father passed from one last heart attack

Denied of signposts to compare
To my own life, the very air
Became as stone, and stopped its trek into my hungry lungs

And then I come to dry-eyed decision
To sally on without his vision
And continue upward, on my own, along life's twisted rungs

Survival is Overrated

our hearts play gladiatorial games
and the arterial spray on the sand
makes a picture of two hands holding
a sword for a kiss, a spear for a caress
a shield for a guarded look
Caesar gives the big thumbs-up
but we die anyway, in our own little ways
here and there, we die a bit and a bit more
but oh
OH
what
a
way
to
go!

Kentucky Gag Order

an invisible hand wraps around my throat
like a kentucky gag order
pours molten lead down my gullet
keeping the information inside
i ride westward leaving the city in ruin behind me
but i can't really talk about it
i'd be tied up in years of litigation
and who has the time or patience for that?
the fingers of my fractured sense of accomplishment
and weeds from the overgrown, grown-over garden of my shame
choke like a roadblock man-hunt
hunting for the man i should have been
the man, perhaps, i still could be?
we'll see